Holidays & Drama - Part II

Now Joshua's holiday  "drama" ended up all right. Did L's??

After the cancelled Thanksgiving-week visit with dad, I didn't really expect him to schedule any more visits. I finally heard from mom the first week of December. She actually sent me her work schedule for the first time, and was asking for 3 visits that week. CM called and said dad wanted 3 visits that week.

Um, excuse me? These people haven't wanted to see their child/made an effort to see their child and now they want almost every day with her?

Oh wait, this is the roller coaster ride we signed up for.

Ok, sure, whatever. ;)

Dad scheduled Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday at the office. Mom scheduled Tuesday (in case Dad cancelled, which he did) and Thursday, unsupervised.
Dad's Wednesday visit was awkward and difficult, per the CM. He didn't know how to handle L's emotional state (of course she was distressed and upset - she hadn't seen him since October so she didn't remember). CM thought it would be a wake-up call, but it wasn't. He cancelled Friday's visit the morning of, not by calling the CM, but rather when the visitation supervisor called to confirm, he said he wasn't coming.

Meanwhile, mom is all of a sudden in a hurry to get her home study done and approved…she thinks she can kick everyone into gear, to work around her schedule, so that she can have overnight visits by Christmas….CM said "not gonna happen".

Fast-forward to the week before Christmas. (Mom saw L once more between the first week and now.)
It was a Sunday, and mom had L from 11am-5pm. Upon arrival at our pre-determined meeting spot for pick up, grandma was driving (she's not supposed to transport) and L was in different clothes. Grandma tries to confront me about giving them visits on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day….which mom and I had already discussed. Since she did not have her overnight visits approved (she acted surprised), I agreed to meet them Christmas Day in the afternoon.

Once they left, I went to change L back into her other onesie to be more comfortable (she was in a fancy, stiff-fabric Christmas dress) and gagged when I pulled it out of the plastic bag they handed me. It REEKED of cigarette smoke. Poor girl was already sick/coughing, and must have spent all day around smoke. I was nauseated and disgusted. I immediately texted the CM and informed her of all of the issues encountered on this visit. The following day, a Monday, she looked into mom's drug test results (why this isn't done immediately is a whole entirely separate issue but it infuriates me nonetheless!) and found out that she had missed the two most recently ordered drug tests and the last one she did take was 12/3 and she tested positive for alcohol. She is under 21. When the CM addressed this issue with mom, the response was "I sometimes drink wine with my mom after work" as if it's no big deal. I will refrain from making further comments on that issue…
CM suggested mom talk to her attorney, but that she was going to suspend unsupervised visits for the time-being. If mom could pass 4 random drug screens in a row, she could get them back. Mom said she would talk to her lawyer and get back to the CM. She never did. Meanwhile, I'm trying to figure out what to do about Christmas Day!
I didn't hear from mom all day Christmas Eve, and since she's supposed to schedule/confirm visits 24 hours in advance, I assumed we were in the clear. At 8:30pm I got a text from a random number simply saying "Hey, it's ______ (moms name)". My house was still filled with people, we were trying to do some sweet Santa surprises for our oldest, get the kiddos bathed and in bed (but Christmas Jammie's pictures first!!), and I get that text. I literally dumped my phone on my bed and closed the door….NOT dealing with that right now! After every little one was tucked in, after all of our family had left, and Jose and I were sitting on the couch, I got my phone and we were able to laugh about it. "What in the world do I say to this?!" I remember asking Jose. I refused to discuss personal or case details with someone "claiming" to be L's mom, but I had no proof of that. He jokingly said to write back "Hey". So I did! Ha! I just wrote back "Hello" and left it at that. I never heard back, and that was that.

We had an amazing Christmas Eve with family and a nice, relaxing Christmas Day. After the kids opened their presents that morning, we had a big breakfast and headed over to Nana and Papa's to play at the park. No more drama, thank goodness. :)