Let's go back a few weeks, and I'll tell you the story of how we got foster child #2!
On a Tuesday evening, Florida Baptist Children's Homes had an informational meeting. We had really promoted it to our friends, family, and even random people we met at the water park (No, really. That happened!), so we figured we should go and support our "recruits" and then we were going out to dinner..."Date Night"! :)
We walked into the room and our lovely support worker, Judy, asks us "Hey, do you guys want another little boy?"
We both just look at each other and laugh...more like nervous chuckle, maybe.
Adjusting to three was going well, but there were definitely rough spots. We had gotten numerous texts and calls about other placements since getting "L" and had turned everything else down. I just wasn't sure if I could handle another one. I wanted to take in another foster child, just wasn't sure if I was really ready. The conversation continued:
Judy: "No, really. I have an 18 month old boy returning to care tomorrow afternoon. He's being brought to the office and we need somewhere for him to go. I know you want a girl....but....he's also free and clear for adoption."
Oh, junk. She just said the A word!! WHAT?! When we initially inquired about foster care and adopting through foster care we were told that the above-mentioned scenario basically never happens (being asked to take a placement that is already cleared for adoption, especially a younger child). Except it does, now and then, in very few, isolated cases. Like this one, apparently.
Deep breath.
Judy: "Here, read the child study. Oh, and here's a picture of him." (Handing me her phone)
Oh. My. Lanta.
He's cute. And when I read that child study write up I was choked up, angry, sad, and frustrated all at the same time. You see, he was being returned to the system by his own family members who had almost completed the adoption process themselves. The only home he's ever known. The home he's lived in since he was approximately 3 months old. The negative things said about this poor baby worried me a little, but strangely enough I just had a peace.
We stayed the whole meeting, spoke to the group about why we became foster parents, answered some questions, and then headed out to dinner. We discussed the possibility of taking in this boy, adopting him, long term/short term, medical issues (there are supposedly a few), the kids already at home, etc.
We agreed that if the other family who was praying about taking him passed, we would take him.
I texted Judy that night telling her we'd take him if the other family didn't. The next day, Wednesday, July 9th, around 4pm we had another little boy in the house!
So, with that preamble....here's our current update:
Foster kid(s) in home: Two! "L" and "DS"
Age(s): 5 months old (L), and 18 months old (DS)
Recent Milestones:
L: is able to take her paci out AND put it back in....most of the time. ;) She likes to play in the pack n play because the boys can't get to her! She likes sitting in the bumbo seat or the jumper and observing everyone. Trying to "crawl" and "sit"....kind of. She'll be there soon, though!
DS: Getting adjusted to us, our home, our routine, our expectations. Getting love and positive attention has really helped his demeanor.
Habits:
L: Is getting attached.....she freaks out when we leave her line of sight.
DS: Had a lot of bad habits formed at his former placement; tantrums, hitting, etc. But it's getting better. He's realizing we don't accept that kind of behavior.
I sleep on my:
L: Belly, mostly. Recently she's been better about going into her crib awake and putting herself to sleep. I'd say this happens half of the time...the other half she needs us to pat her.
DS: He rolls around quite a bit before settling in on his belly. He's a good sleeper for the most part!
At nap time I need:
L: Paci, sound machine, and either her bed or the car seat IN the car....she's gotten a little more picky.
DS: Blankie and bed. He doesn't fall asleep easily in the car...
Eating habits:
L: 5 oz every 3 hours
DS: Anything dry and crunchy is easy (cheerios, puffs, graham crackers, pop tarts, etc), other than that it's pretty hit or miss. He was primarily on a liquid diet before coming to us....so we are introducing him to various foods and the concept of eating meals vs drinking them.
Family dynamic: Everyone's doing pretty well! L loves watching the boys, DS is learning how to play with Daniel and Caleb appropriately and learning that we don't hit. Daniel is walking now and into everything. Caleb is learning how to share and not to be bossy ;)
Other notes:
We are meeting L's mom and dad at a kid-favorite public spot this upcoming week and could use prayer! We want to develop a relationship with them so if/when she goes back, we can still be kept in the loop (at least), if not be semi-involved in her life. We also want to show them Jesus, and explain why we are doing what we're doing. We've tried to meet up with them a few times and it's never worked, so we're also praying that they actually show up! :)
Case updates:
L: Court the end of this month.....they want unsupervised visits so we will see how that goes.
DS: Court beginning of September...we've started the adoption paperwork and will see where that takes us!
Age(s): 5 months old (L), and 18 months old (DS)
Recent Milestones:
L: is able to take her paci out AND put it back in....most of the time. ;) She likes to play in the pack n play because the boys can't get to her! She likes sitting in the bumbo seat or the jumper and observing everyone. Trying to "crawl" and "sit"....kind of. She'll be there soon, though!
DS: Getting adjusted to us, our home, our routine, our expectations. Getting love and positive attention has really helped his demeanor.
Habits:
L: Is getting attached.....she freaks out when we leave her line of sight.
DS: Had a lot of bad habits formed at his former placement; tantrums, hitting, etc. But it's getting better. He's realizing we don't accept that kind of behavior.
I sleep on my:
L: Belly, mostly. Recently she's been better about going into her crib awake and putting herself to sleep. I'd say this happens half of the time...the other half she needs us to pat her.
DS: He rolls around quite a bit before settling in on his belly. He's a good sleeper for the most part!
At nap time I need:
L: Paci, sound machine, and either her bed or the car seat IN the car....she's gotten a little more picky.
DS: Blankie and bed. He doesn't fall asleep easily in the car...
Eating habits:
L: 5 oz every 3 hours
DS: Anything dry and crunchy is easy (cheerios, puffs, graham crackers, pop tarts, etc), other than that it's pretty hit or miss. He was primarily on a liquid diet before coming to us....so we are introducing him to various foods and the concept of eating meals vs drinking them.
Family dynamic: Everyone's doing pretty well! L loves watching the boys, DS is learning how to play with Daniel and Caleb appropriately and learning that we don't hit. Daniel is walking now and into everything. Caleb is learning how to share and not to be bossy ;)
Other notes:
We are meeting L's mom and dad at a kid-favorite public spot this upcoming week and could use prayer! We want to develop a relationship with them so if/when she goes back, we can still be kept in the loop (at least), if not be semi-involved in her life. We also want to show them Jesus, and explain why we are doing what we're doing. We've tried to meet up with them a few times and it's never worked, so we're also praying that they actually show up! :)
Case updates:
L: Court the end of this month.....they want unsupervised visits so we will see how that goes.
DS: Court beginning of September...we've started the adoption paperwork and will see where that takes us!
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